Patience is more than just waiting

There was this young lady. In her late-thirties. She carried a handbag. With an iPhone in her hand. Even before the boarding gates were open, she was already there. At least three hours to go before she could board the plane. She appeared to be very calm. Why would she come this early? How could she sit in the same place for hours doing nothing?

If patience was only about waiting, why then are we able to get to the railway station or the airport well ahead of the departure? Rarely finding ourselves have enough time to wait for the cab that we take to reach the railway station or the airport. Is patience about your time? Is patience about your priorities?

Patience is a behaviour showing high moral standards. It is a quality that can be learnt and developed by practice. The common saying is that patience is generally easy to talk about, but not so to practice. What if I told you that it’s not as difficult as it seems to be?

The easiest way to get started practising patience is to learn to accommodate. If you are a perfectionist, learn to accept imperfections. If you are always busy and time conscious, learn to set aside a buffer time to accommodate delays. Every one of us should also learn to allow a portion of unwelcomed or unpleasant things to happen in our lives. Again it is easy said than done. There are many factors to consider when you start learning to accommodate. The time period by which you will be able to allow delays, the context of the situation where you accept unpleasant things, etc. However, one can effectively respond to these factors as they start to practice patience.

It may not always be possible to accommodate delays or unpleasant things to happen in our lives without hurting ourselves or causing discomfort. A delay when you board a direct train for a vacation may be more natural to allow, than when you have a connecting train at the next station. Many a time this discomfort causes worry about an uncertain outcome as a result of the delays or the unpleasant things that happen in our lives. When you have such a situation where you are unsure about the consequences, you tend to get nervous, and the unease makes you angry. To avoid this situation and to be patient, one should learn to hope for the best. When you are optimistic and hope for the best to happen when the outcomes are uncertain, it reduces your discomfort and makes you stay calm.

We now know that patience is to accommodate the worst and hope for the best. There is one last thing we should never forget which completes our learning. You should learn to allow the occurrence of something you would dislike or disagree without interfering. That is, you should try not to stop that from continuing even if that hurts or appears to cause discomfort. This stage is initially tough and requires a lot of conscious effort. However, over time it becomes more intuitive.

These are the three simple and practical ways one can learn to be patient. Patience is a key to keep yourself in control. Patience is the key to success. Practice patience, it is the strongest of all warriors.